GAHHH!

Okay I just need to fess up. I have a serious case of lazy and deflection lazy. There's so much I need to get done and I either ignore it or act busy by doing ultimately useless things. I've recently started reading up on things that are important to me again, like making things at home for cheaper and/or better than I can buy at the store, or urban/suburban homesteading in general. I feel a bit better at that because it's not me spending hours on Pinterest pinning random fun things or feeling guilty because of all those annoying motivational pins about weight loss >_<

When it comes down to the nitty-gritty (which is a weird word...), I am lazy and it just cannot go on like this. I want to be a wife and mother who cooks, sews, gardens, preserves food, raises chickens/quail/rabbits/a pygmy goat who shall be named Geraldine, home schools the kids, still goes to anime conventions with the kids in cosplay of course, and draws comics that are just plain epic. Kinda' ambitious isn't it? It is especially when I'm a wife who has 36 pounds to lose by August yet can't seem to get off her duff and exercise, can't remember where her husbands socks ran off to, has to fight the clutter to even find her sewing machine let alone sew anything more than a straight-ish line, can't remember to do her own self-taught drawing lessons, will be doing pretty much all of her JAFAX cosplay last minute and killed the cord on her graphic tablet.

When I look at that list, I'm so very glad that I'm not alone in trying to make this happen. Seriously, if I didn't have Jesus, I'd go absolutely insane. I know that all things are possible because He gives me the strength to start and keep going, despite myself.

And now, Pygmy Goats, curtesy of Crosswynd Farms of Shelton, WA.

I love the long-suffering expression on who I presume is the momma goat.

Wysp Got Me Thinking

I've recently joined an art community called Wysp (http://www.wysp.ws/) as it is more about the artistic journey than the popularity contest that deviantart can be. I was surprised to see that part of the account set up is a mini-interview so you can give other wyspers an idea of what you are about. The second question was "Where do you want your journey to lead you?". I answered it pretty generically, stating how I'd like to be published and I want to use my creativity in homeschooling my future kids.

While this is very true, its not all. I seemed to have purposely left out one of my biggest places I want my journey to take me. It's part of the being published bit. But it's the main reason I want to be. I am a believer in Jesus Christ. I believe he died for me so that my sins would no longer be counted against me and so bridged the gap between God and I. I want my comics to reflect this. I want the women who star in my work to represent Jesus to comic readers. This is something that others have tried to do, but the comics were confined to comic versions of Bible passages and woefully terrible piece of drivel that was well-meaning but the lack of in-depth characters and immature art made most of this work laughable.

I want to change this. I want Christians to have accurate representation in the comic world in compelling way that effects people rather than making them laugh. Comics are a mature medium that should be used to tackle difficult subjects, not cliche' teen angst or cheesy Christian-ish superheroes. While I freely admit that this isn't everything there is to offer out there, its kinda' a sad section of literature.

I am ashamed that I didn't have the guts to state this before. All my reasons for not doing so seem pretty ridiculous now because this is who I am. I shouldn't be ashamed of it.

There's Kroger Queso in My Art Cave...

As an artist lately I've been pretty self defeating. I have some homework I have yet to even start because its a correspondence course and I can't seem to remember how big a deal this is because its a beginning course. I'm a bit beyond it by now but like most courses like this, you can't move on until you've done first one. ~sigh~ I have half a mind to send a decent piece of older work. Maybe I should. I haven't the foggiest idea at this point. But I am determined to turn it in today.

Some of my problem right now is that my art cave has been invaded by all kinds of things, some mine, some my husband's despite the fact that he has quite a bit of space for his things. And then there's the two empty jars that used to be Krogers Monterey Jack Queso Dip. Why they are in front of my Mac, I don't know. It's definitely a better place than where they were, on my husband's nightstand where he would knock them over trying to grab his glasses. But why on my desk?

If you haven't guessed already, my husband and I are chronically disorganized and have some mild hoarding tendencies. I've been trying to get rid of things forever and he tells me I should save it. Sometimes its the other way around, but more likely I'm guilty of enabling him to get more stuff. Just to make things crazier, our roommate is much the same way. She has us working on it since we'd like to move someday soon and we don't want to drag all this junk with us.

My biggest problem in this anticlutter campaign is that most of my stuff has huge sentimental value. I have excellent long term memory so I can remember how and when I received something with ease. And that's usually attached to fond memories. I'm trying to be ruthless about some things like the countless boxes of really weird things. But its rough, especially because my creative side comes up with ideas of how to use the weird things again.

For example, I still have hundreds of paper cranes left from my wedding back in 2010. I'm planning on turning them into wall art piece, but for now they're all sitting a bin in the basement along with some huge rectangular vases and my bludgeoning club of a bouquet.

My Bludgeoning Club Bouquet

Me with Bouquet for size reference. And yes I was trying to crane kick despite the dress and bloomers.

Pray for me or send good vibes to help me get this insanity under control! Whichever is your thing.

And I wonder...

I'm thinking I'm having one of those "why in the world did I decide to start a blog?" days. I know it takes awhile to build up a readership. Not surprise there. I'm just wondering if people are actually reading this or are they just wandering here through a search for something completely different. If I'm not careful, this is going to get whiny so I won't dwell on this too very much. My big question is, how am I getting so many page views from Russia on this blog and my other one, Lunar Dreams? Maybe that's just how Russian searches roll.

No news on the status of my graphics tablet yet. I'm not sure my husband has looked at it since he noticed I put in on the wire rack next to his side of the bed. That's fine though. He works epically hard so I don't have to. I miss my tablet though, as I haven't been feeling well lately and being able to work on the painting I posted about last time would be really nice.

Not much else to say except that I'm hoping I can gain a readership soon!

I'll leave you with this:

Gary Oldman is the only Dracula in my heart.

Thwarting Awesomeness

Have you ever been working on something with the potential for major Awesome and then something horrible happens that prevents you from working on it?

Here is the my potential awesome:

It was going to be amazing. I've never tried to color my work while omitting the lines before and was therefor stoked that it seemed to be working well. But now I'm stuck at this point, with Lark halfway colored and nude, while Alfa(on the left) and Drew (on the right, as you probably deduced) remain sea foam green and some strange orange-brown.

So what happened that stopped the awesome from become more so? The cord to my graphic tablet shorted out. The only reason I didn't cry hysterically is because it isn't a lost cause. My husband is going to see what he can do about it, and I plan on reinforcing it with embroidery floss, which also prevents tangling. It also looks pretty but that's not the point. Hopefully, my magic man can fix it any will be back in awesome business. But for now, I'll look for references and resources while "watching" episodes of Mystery Science Theater 3000.

While I'm waiting, I hope I don't go all Mrs. Nesbit on everyone.

But mad props to this guy for dressing up like this